Chapter One: 1. Gemstone Faith

“If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God,
who gives to all men generously
and without reproaching,
and it will be given him.
But let him ask in faith, with no doubting,
for he who doubts is like a wave of the sea
that is driven and tossed by the wind.”James 1:5-6 rsv 

1. Gemstone Faith

Ron and I were spending our fortieth wedding anniversary in the village of Cambria on the central coast of California. As my husband rested in the motel room after a long drive, I sat on a rough-hewn bench on the cliffs overlooking Moonstone Beach. My exhaustion lifted, and my soul was refreshed as I gazed at the silken blue sky, vast tranquil sea, and majestic Monterey pines gracing the rugged coastline.It was as bright as daylight that Friday evening at 8:00 p.m. Surfers in black wet suits perched on their surfboards waiting to ride the ocean’s waves, but the placid breakers rolled lazily ashore. The gentle whitewashed surf was fringed in lacy foam—quite a contrast to the savage sea storms that had at one time uprooted giant trees and tossed them along the shore.

I worked my way down the steep earthen steps to the rock-strewn beach. I combed through wet rocks until I found a small heart-shaped stone to add to my collection. The rust and sand-gray heart was pierced with three pin-sized holes. Then I discovered a white misshapen heart stone with an ingrained gray ribbon across it.

I was fascinated by the varied colors and shapes of the stones—eggs, flats, oblongs, ovals, and rounds. Some pebbles looked like shiny chocolate-covered candies. Many rocks had a polished sheen, others a rough sandy finish.Gemstone FaithThe sea-smoothed stones reminded me of how our faith can be turned from a jagged rock into a gem. The ocean, a giant gemstone tumbler, turns stones end over end, washing them up and down the shore. The constant rolling motion of waves grinds rocks and sand together, smoothing sharp-edged stones through abrasion.

Life’s rock tumbler rough-grinds our faith through the abrasion of trials and gritty everyday irritations. Constant waves of suffering can turn us end over end, tossing us from one crisis to the next until we feel as if our heart is pierced with sorrow.

Rocks that are used for polishing must possess certain qualities; one of them is hardness. On the hardness scale, our skin is about 1.5 compared to a diamond’s 10, which is thousands of times harder. Our faith needs to have the durability and hardness to hold up under abrasive, grinding pressures if it’s going to have diamond-like quality.

On the surface, a polished rock may appear to be a gemstone, but closer examination reveals nearly invisible defects and fractures. We may outwardly display spiritual strength until sharp blows break us open, exposing defects in our faith.

Some rocks are broken into fragments; then a piece is cut into the shape of a gem and tumbled with abrasives to grind away sharp edges. Before the Lord is able to begin preparing us for the gem-making process, we may feel as if we’ve been broken and splintered into pieces.

To hurry any part of the lengthy grinding-polishing process will produce an inferior gemstone, and so it is with our faith. Our trust in God can be turned into a gem if we’re willing to endure the grinding, shaping, tumbling, sanding, and polishing process. To develop a commitment to Christ of the highest quality, we need to be willing to submit to this lifelong faith-transforming process.

Hammering trials break off the rough edges of sin, and grinding hardships chip away superficial spirituality. Heart-tumbling losses deepen and strengthen our faith; sorrows form and shape compassion; painful sanding makes us spiritually tender, and tedious time-consuming polishing turns us into Christ-glorifying gemstones.

But are we willing to surrender ourselves to the Master stonecutter so He can grind and polish and shape us into His image?

Search for Spiritual Meaning in Suffering Introduction

Welcome

April 2015

I wrote this devotional Bible study for
those of us who are struggling with
doubts and trusting the Lord in affliction. 

Introduction

Have you ever faltered in your faith during heartbreaking trials? You wondered if you could continue on your spiritual journey. Maybe you’ve walked away from your faith during trying times or wandered in a dry spiritual wasteland searching for God but not finding Him. Have you been spiritually disappointed with yourself—and God? You questioned if you’d ever find your way back to the Lord or if He would ever find you again.

A loss or series of losses can cause us to question our faith and feel overwhelming emotional and spiritual pain. We wonder if God even cares. We struggle with conflicts between what we expect from God and what we actually experience. During trials we don’t have the spiritual victory we hear about from books, messages, and the claims of other Christians.

We’re hounded by nagging guilt and even shame that our faith isn’t strong enough to hold up in suffering. We may struggle with anger, bitterness, depression, and fear.

We spiritually waver, wanting to hang onto our faith one moment, and the next we want to give up. We know we should trust the Lord and release our burdens into His care. But we can’t seem to do it, and we don’t understand why we just can’t get over our pain or why God doesn’t do something to relieve us.


If you relate to such spiritual struggles, join me and many other Christians. This search for meaning in suffering is a spiritual quest, a lifelong journey in a single direction to our heavenly destination. But if you’re like me, you feel lost at times. You feel as if you’re spiritually taking the long way around to get where you belong.

What makes our search so difficult and sometimes scary is that the road we travel on is perilous. Heartbreaking losses and trials block our pathway and test our faith. Some of us get stuck and can’t get past emotional and spiritual roadblocks.

This series of blogs was written to help us get over those obstacles and keep us moving forward spiritually. We’ll discover how to deal with many different kinds of major losses and trials we or loved ones experience. If you’re looking for easy spiritual answers or quick-fix solutions to suffering, you won’t find them here. But we’ll learn how to keep on our spiritual journey during trials and find the needed spiritual support to work through grief and pain.

In writing The Search for Spiritual Meaning in Suffering, I’ve used a wide variety of resources, including personal accounts of many women. They graciously shared their stories of loss and how their faith was challenged in suffering.

This study may not be what you need if you haven’t suffered a major loss. But it will help you understand what others are experiencing. It can help you learn how to be more compassionate and minister to those who are hurting.

Often we fail to realize the impact suffering has on our faith. The primary purpose of this study is take us through the entire grieving-healing process and the spiritual phases we go through in suffering. Those three phases include spiritual reaction, rebuilding, and renewal.

In the spiritual reaction phase, we can’t believe God has allowed us to experience this painful loss. In the spiritual rebuilding phase, we have moved beyond our initial spiritual shock and have started growing in our faith through grief and trials. The spiritual renewal phase brings us into a deeper relationship with our Comforter who is always with us to love and support us in our pain. The Gifts of Suffering help us to see that God uses our trials as a gift to others and to us.

The Search for Spiritual Meaning in Suffering will help us gain an understanding of the ways our faith is tested as we go through trials. We’ll discover how we can grow through grief and come out with a stronger faith. We’ll come to terms with the mysteries of suffering, find spiritual meaning, and see how God can turn our losses into a gift to other hurting people.

One of my concerns as you work through this healing process is the danger of being defeated by negative self-talk and shame-filled thoughts, such as: I shouldn’t be anxious. I shouldn’t hurt so much. I shouldn’t cry. I’m dumb or stupid for feeling this way.

Even the strongest Christians hurt, sin, and have spiritual conflicts. We’re all on this search for spiritual meaning, so keep reminding yourself that the Lord accepts you as you are and how you feel. He is always present with you to support you through this healing, spiritually renewing process. I pray you will become more accepting and gentle with yourself as you and the Lord work through this healing process.

One of my greatest desires in writing The Search for Spiritual Meaning in Suffering was to encourage you that keeping your faith in suffering has great significance in the eyes of God and an unseen host of witnesses as well. Our losses can have personal and spiritual meaning, and our steadfast trust in the Lord counts for all eternity. I hope you will come to rely on the Lord’s ever-loving kindness. He is always with you no matter how dark and deep your heartaches go.

Here are some suggestions to help you on your journey. The chapters don’t have to be completed in a week, so give yourself the freedom to work through the series at your own pace.

Each week’s opening page has a Scripture passage that can be memorized. This is followed by a chapter and seven days of brief devotional studies on the same subject.
Before you start reading each day’s devotional, print it, and then write the date on the top of the page. Later you may want to reread what you’ve written. The dates will help you relate your written responses to the events and concerns you were experiencing during that period. You will be able to compare where you were in your pilgrimage of faith and how you have progressed since then.

Each day’s devotion begins with Scripture passages that correlate with the chapter theme. The “Scripture Reading” and “Practicing the Spiritual Life” were based on the Holy Bible: New International Version (NIV). Using this Bible or another modern version will make it easier to answer the questions in that section. You may want to look up passages in several different versions to gain a greater depth of meaning.

Under “Practicing the Spiritual Life,” the questions are for personal application. You will also find some assignments to help you work through the grieving-healing process and grow spiritually. Take time to seriously consider those questions, pray, and seek the Lord’s guidance. The questions are meant to help you apply the truths of Scripture to your everyday life.